As always thanks to the new Chubby Chasers...Keep on spreading the love...the responses have been overwhelming...
I wanna give some Fat Fuck Love to Wife of Don King (WDK) for her bday...she had a really awesome party last night...and by awesome I mean married couples sitting around on a couch watching the video from their rehearsal dinner....I also gave her love cause she asked to be in the blog...Glad I showed up...
This post will recap sat and then I am gonna do another one tonight on today...So 2 posts today folks...GET PUMPED!!!!!
Quick rundown on Saturday food..
Bfast-woke up to0 late
Lunch -Grilled Chicken and Salad
Liquid Dinner
Late Night-Roast Beef on a plate (more on this in a bit)
Yesterday I attended a surprise 30th bday for one of my friends at the Boat Basin Cafe...It was a lot of fun...He will be referred to in my blog as Short Bus because to put it nicely he is not the sharpest tool in the shed.
Everywhere in life there are temptations...yesterday was a big one...at Short Bus' party they had a buffet of food with nothing but awesome crap...I mean awesome fucking crap...chicken fingers, quesadillas, and all sorts of fried deliciousness...I wanted to eat this stuff bad...There is nothing more awesome sitting at a table w your friends when they are chowing down on dirty greasy food and you get to eat some peppers and cauliflower...I kept having this overwhelming urge to just jump over the table grab someones food and rub it all over my body and face...sadly this did not happen...
After the parents and other old folks left the real shit began...we left the Boat Basin and hit up Prohibition on 85th and Columbus...pretty cool fucking bar...As soon as we got in the Jamo started flowing and it flowed hard...As the beers and shots were going down an 80s cover band came on....
As the music started playing I TORE IT UP...I WAS CUTTING UP THE RUG BIG TIME!!!!....The thing about me dancing is I look somewhere in between having a seizure and downs syndrome...not a pretty sight by any means...The best part of this is when I am in the proverbial "zone" I am pretty sure I think I could probably win So You Think You Can Dance...almost everyone else would think I should be committed...
As the band was playing we were escorted to the front by the security guard because our spastic dancing was bothering him...The girls we pushed in front of were not happy about it...One yelled at me and told me to "move my fat ass out of her space" As we ignored and kept dancing I was stomped on, elbowed, a beer dumped on my head, and then my personal favorite had my fat pinched several times...This is all a day in the life of a Fat Fuck...getting seat snubbed on the train does not seem so bad now...
As I stumbled out of the bar I hit up that other redic party I just mentioned...After that the real fun began...As I got out of the cab all I could think about was DRUNK FOOD...A Fat Fuck's Favorite...walking past me were people scarfing down pizza and grabbing sandwiches from the deli in my building...The only thing I could think about was how much I wanted shovel in a bacon egg and cheese and then get some Oreo cookies...Some how in my drunk state all I ordered was a half a pound of roast beef....Went upstairs put some mustard on a plate and went to town...I might have well just have played seven minutes in heaven with the beef the way I was making love to it...note to self...when you pass out with a plate of mustard on your chest you will wake up covered in mustard on your chest, face, back and orifices you did not even know you had...also mustard to the nostril is quite pungent and stings...a lot...I am still smelling it...
I am proud of myself for this (well not the mustard part)...I am realistic and know I am gonna booze my face of but at least I limited the side effects from it...So time to wrap this one up and get a jump on the next...
Until 5 minutes from now when I post again....eat a bacon egg and cheese on a roll...for This Fat Fuck....
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